Does Pretty Privilege Actually Exist?

In a world and society filled with unrealistic standards of beauty, competition between the sexes has become quite the issue. Recently, I saw a skit that was released onto Tik Tok. In this skit, the student body president thought it was necessary to place a "Pretty Tax." This tax basically said that if you were in the top 10% or higher percentile of being pretty or beautiful, you should be taxed for everything you do. That meant taxes on food, on basic needs such as using the bathroom, whatever you could think of. If you were pretty, it was taxed. Now if you weren't considered beautiful by society's standards, you were free of charge. And while this was a completely fictional skit, I was amazed by the comments.

Hordes of women gathered in the comments saying how this seemed fair and how pretty privilege exists. And I got to thinking. Does pretty privilege actually exist or is it internalized competition and insecurity? Now, I do not think I am this gorgeous human being who could be a model for vogue, but I am definitely not ugly. That being said, when I remembered what school was like, it seemed as if pretty privilege was reversed. All of the most beautiful girls in the school were usually very lonely, talked about, or were harassed by boys. Now if you call that pretty privilege, then we have a set of different issues that should be addressed.

Personally, in my life, my mom has always told me that I was beautiful. From the day I was born, all the way up to who I am today, my mom has always said that many people will be mean, many people will start rumors, etc, all because they are insecure. Looking back on my life, I realized that she's not wrong. Of course this is going to come off as arrogant, but we live in a competitive world. For example, I remember the summer after my freshman year of high school, I had this 'best friend', or at least I thought I did. We would hang out all the time. Then when our sophomore year started, I realized that a lot of boys were making inappropriate remarks towards me. Disgusting, just disgusting. I started to hear the rumors from people I had never even seen or met before. When it all boiled down as to why this was happening, it turned out that my 'best friend' was making up rumors about me. I asked myself why would she do this? When confronted, she said that she was insecure and felt that she couldn't be friends with someone she saw as competition. Okay, fair enough, I guess. That was the end of that friendship.

Now that was a more direct situation. I started to realize people's behaviors towards me even after that. Girls would be mean to me for no reason when all I wanted was to be friends. I remember one specific occasion, a girl threw a basketball at my face in gym class and said, "You don't look so pretty anymore now do you?" Could I really be the issue? Was it something with my personality? Do I just have an annoying presence? Again, my mom would tell me, they are jealous of you. I am still struggling to see the pretty privilege in all of this.

In addition, I hear examples of pretty privilege that seem to be myths. Myth #1, people or guys in particular, will do favors for you. If favors mean getting catcalled, then yes absolutely. Myth #1- Busted. Myth #2, you get out of punishments for wrong doings. It's kind of hard to say that when it seems that everyone doesn't like someone who is attractive. So, if the majority of society feels threatened by someone who is pretty, why would they get away with things? It makes no sense. My most recent evidence comes from the Fall/Winter semester of school. Just this past year, a very stunning and beautiful girl was in my biology class. She often came unprepared and was caught cheating on a test. She was not let off the hook and was dismissed from the school for Academic Dishonesty. Myth #2-Busted.

Furthermore, I was reading a study called "The Roots of Loneliness Project." This segment was called, "Beautiful and Lonely: Why Being Pretty Can Often Be a Real Drag." There is one particular section that I want to focus on. This section talked about why being beautiful can affect your relationships and often leave you lonely. Alison Huff stated that, "Sometimes, we find attractive people of the same sex to be threatening, and we might judge them as being less talented, almost out of spite." She also stated that, "...members of their own sex might outright reject them because of their attractiveness, which can lead to feelings of loneliness if they’re unable to connect with those around them, especially in women." I simply have to put in one more quote because I feel that it is so important that this is understood. Blogger, Raquel from a Pretty Easy Life said, "Jealousy and envy are part of the price you pay if you look good, even in your own family.”

Of course I have to add my own two cents. I am going to be completely delusional and say this is why I have been so lonely for the past 2 years. A girl's gotta lift herself up somehow lol. I am 20. I have been a full-time college student since I was 18 and have made no friends. I mostly hang out with my boyfriend or my sister, and that's really it. I wish I could point out a defining factor as to why no one wants to be friends with me. I have tried clubs, I've tried talking to people and getting out of my comfort zone and I am often reacted to with disdain. I am not Brooke Shields or Tyra Banks, so it is hard for me to understand why someone would be intimidated or threatened by me. So, I have come to this conclusion.

There is always going to be someone prettier. There is always going to be someone who has more confidence or just has that spark. It doesn't matter what percentile or level you are on. There will always be a new standard. Let me give you an example. When I moved to the town I live in now, I was 9 years old. I had big curly hair, freckles, and hazel eyes. Everyone who lived in my town and went to my school had thin, straight hair, was extremely white, and often had blue or brown eyes. I remember being made fun of because I didn't look like the average kid.

To help you better understand, my mom is Hispanic and has brown skin, brown eyes, and brown hair. My dad is white but has a bit of a golden/tan complexion and has hazel eyes. To get to the point, it was very obvious that I am mixed. At that time, the standards of beauty said that you should have long, straight hair and blue eyes, and you should be skinny. Now, the "exotic" type of beauty has become the new standard. Curls are praised. Thick thighs and thick bodies are praised. Tans are praised, etc. The curls I have, were made fun of years ago. Now, people often tell me how beautiful they think my curls are. What's my point? The standard of beauty is always changing. Meaning, there will always be intimidation. So, it isn't necessarily pretty privilege. I believe the correct term is "competition", except the rules change every couple of years.